N'importe Quoi

  For school this week (and the next) we're having an elective session. Basically you take two classes (each three hours long) with lunch in between and then go home. I ended up taking Song-writing and Lifeskills. Both are relatively pleasant, and I've been enjoying song-writing. Who wouldn't enjoy sitting around for three hours messing with pianos, writing lyrics, and chatting with friends? Not to mention that as long as you eventually write a song it counts for school credit. I already finished my first song. It's no jewel, but maybe my readers would enjoy reading the lyrics?

"Anything"

 I'll keep my eyes open

And deny my fear

the satisfaction of knowing

that the end is near

fighting hard for tomorrow

though what I hold dear

and my resistance to sorrow

is sure to disappear

Chorus: So I'll just tie my scarf a little tighter

and my adversaries will know fear

history proves I was born a fighter

and I'll do anything to have you near

shortcomings can be overcome

and courage can prevail

yet though the battle is not won

all signs say I will fail

I've got my sword and shield

I'm ready for the day

I'm not about to yield

where there's a will there's a way

Chorus

to all who oppose, you'll see

my "white flag" is hard to find

all thoughts of letting you go free

have completely fled my mind

and when the smoke clears

reflected off of broken mirrors

is the promise of tomorrow

a day that's mine to grow

Chorus

Silencieux Chanson

I really love music. It calms, it inspires, it drives, it saddens, it cheers up, it creates mood, it tells stories, and so much more.  I just think to myself sometimes, what exactly God is trying to say by making something so amazing? Music seems to be core in a lot of people's lives (mine and my parent's included), not to mention that it's  a good form of worship.  Maybe this is a strange thing to think, but why did God make music? Why do we accept it so naturally? I can't imagine a world without music. It's so very precious to me, I don't think I'd be half the person I am without it.

This seems to be another question I don't have the answer to.  I catch myself questioning things a lot these days. ( My previous post mentioned that I question myself, well I'm not the only thing I wonder about.) I'm glad my questions are intelligent though.  Wondering why the sky is blue seems much less philosophical than pondering the existence of music.

On an entirely different subject; finals are coming up soon. I. AM. GOING. TO. EXPLODE. I can't handle stress from every class at once.  Something tells me I'm going to do absolutely great on one subject and then get royally screwed in every other class. ( I'm probably going to do good in English, that's a given with me. And I think I'm exempt from the Latin final, but Physics, Algebra II, and Musicianship scare me.... ) Well that's all the things going through my head right now. Good luck sorting through them. 

Questionnant Je

As I sit down at the computer at long last, the thought occurs to me that I'm starting to get caught up in a swirling torrent of busy studying and assignments and schoolwork.  What is keeping me from losing myself in the hustle and bustle?  I have friends that get me by, ones who share my same interests, but wouldn't they change me rather than keep me from changing?   I can feel myself starting to mature under pressure, but I'm still my odd creative little self.

  Maybe I'm not supposed to change?  I often hear things like " during your teenage years you often go through a lot of changes".  I do realize that this mostly applies to your body, but it applies to your mindset too right?  Strange thoughts like these seem to be going through my head lately.  I find myself looking at other people and comparing myself ( though in a good way, mind you).   Who exactly am I?  How do other people view me?  Where am I going?  These are questions I can't answer very easily either.  The only thing I can think is that I have to leave these answers up to God and trust that his plan for me is a solid one.